Male Bashing # 4

Why do men fall asleep immediately after having sex ?
So women can masturbate and finish the job off properly!
 
Behind every great man is a great woman...
and behind every great woman is some guy staring at her ass!
 
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny.
If you see him without a boner, make him a sandwich
 
Did you hear the Viagra now comes in a nasal spray ?
It’s for dickhead

why do men always pay more for car insurance ?
Women don't get blowjobs while they're behind the wheel.
 
A friend of mine used alcohol as a substitute for women. You know what happened ?
He got his penis stuck in the neck of the bottle.
 
It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end...
someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them  

Men are like bagpipes...
You won't get anything unless you blow them first
 
If Eve wore a fig leaf, what did Adam wear ?
A hole in it.

Why don't men wear tight underwear ?
It cuts off circulation to the brain.
 
What’s the definition of a bastard?

A man who bonks you all night with a 2-inch penis,
then kisses you good-bye with a 12-inch tongue.