Dirty Jokes

Quickies

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heello, iss tthhatt thhee sshhoop
iii boouugghht thhee vviibbrrattorr ffrroomm. yes.

ccaann yyoouu tteell mmee hhooww ttoo ttuurrnn
tthhee ffuucckkiinngg tthhiinngg ooffff.

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What's the difference between a whore and a bitch?
Whore's fuck everyone at the party,
Bitches fuck everyone at the party except you.

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What doesn't belong in this list : Meat, Eggs, Wife, Blowjob?
Blowjob: You can beat your meat, eggs or wife, but you can't beat a blowjob.

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How are a lawyer and a prostitute different?
The prostitute stops fucking you after you're dead

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What do you call a truck full of dildos?
Toys for Twats

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Have you heard about the new super-sensitive condoms?
They hang around after the man leaves and talks to the woman.

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What do women & airplanes have in common?
They both have cockpits!

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Women and Tornadoes

How are women and tornadoes alike?
They both moan like hell when they come,
and take the house when they leave.

 

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