Men Bashing Jokes

Men Bashing # 10

Why do men name their penises ?
Because their mother told them not to play with strangers.

Why are married women fatter than single women ?
Because single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed,
where as married women come home, see what's in the Bed and go to the fridge!

What's the fastest way to a man's heart ?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking ?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

When would you care for a man's company ?
When he owns it.

Why do men get married ?
So they don't have to hold their stomachs in any more.

How many men does it take to wallpaper a bathroom ?
Three, if you slice them very thinly.

Why are blonde jokes so short ?
So men can remember them.

What are a woman's four favourite animals ?
A mink in the closet, a Jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bedroom,
and a Jackass to pay for it all.

How can you tell if a man is happy ?
Who cares?

Why do men buy electric lawn mowers ?
So they can find their way back to the house.

How do you get a man to do sit-ups ?
Put the remote control between his toes.

A recent survey asked 100 sexually active women if their twat twitched after sex.
98% replied "No, he just rolls over and goes to sleep."

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact ?
Breasts don't have eyes!

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