Oneliners

Put Downs

Beautiful girl
"Inside every slim, beautiful girl,
is a fat middle-aged woman waiting to get out."

You might not be the best looking girl here,
but beauty is only a light switch away!

I'm not saying she was ugly, but...
When she went camping, the bears built a fire to keep her away.

How do you know when you're really ugly?
Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face

Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face

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